Vail Resorts Announces the Worst Contest in the World

Want to win an Epic Pass for life? All you have to do is be one of the first 10 people to ski or snowboard at all 26 resorts currently covered by the Epic Pass.

So yeah, basically what this means is that the only people who have a shot at winning it are the people who don’t need to win it, the people with — pardon my French — fuck you money. Average schlubs like you and I have a better shot at getting struck by lightning while riding a unicorn and battling a mutant shark who’s allergic to peanuts and shellfish.

This is going to take you six weeks to complete, I’m pretty sure they’re not going to be filling in the 10th winner in March. If you actually want to win it, you have to commit to doing it well before Christmas.   And it is going to cost you — even on a ski bum’s budget — at least $7,000 in airfare, rental cars, gas, food & lodging, but probably closer to $10,000.

With that money, you could buy an Epic Pass a year for the next 20 years or so.  That’s not quite the same as “for life” but it’s good enough, because even if you register and enter and put your best effort in and drain your kids’ college fund and sell one of your kidneys — even after all that, there’s still no guarantee that some retired guy didn’t beat you to the finish line by a day or two.

Worst. Contest. Ever.

Details below, and via Snow.com:

We’re calling all globetrotting, Epic Pass-holding, die-hard skiers and snowboarders for The Epic Race – a season-long competition to visit all 26 resorts spread across four countries that make up the Epic Pass. The first 10 Epic Pass holders to complete the race will win an Epic Pass for life!

Registration for the Epic Race opens November 1, 2013.

Each racer will need to ski or ride all 26 resorts on the 2013/14 Epic Pass (Vail, Beaver Creek, Breckenridge, Keystone, Arapahoe Basin and Eldora in Colorado; Canyons in Park City, Utah; Heavenly, Northstar and Kirkwood at Lake Tahoe; Afton Alps, Minnesota; Mt. Brighton, Michigan; Verbier, Switzerland; Arlberg, Austria – St. Anton, Lech, Zürs, St. Christoph and Stuben; and Les 3 Vallées, France – Courchevel, La Tania, Méribel, Brides-les-Bains, Les Menuires, Saint Martin de Belleville, Val Thorens and Orelle). Epic Racers will be asked to document and share their experience at each resort as they ski to be eligible to win.

You must register to participate in the race, and you must be a 2013/14 Epic Pass holder to register. Don’t have your Epic Pass yet? Buy today – hurry, prices are only guaranteed through October 13th!

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  1. Pingback: agnarchy.com | Mt. Brighton – December 7, 2013

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